What's Living in That Gap?

You already know what to do.

You've known for a while. Not weeks. A while.

You've done the learning. You can see how the outcome changes your life. You could probably walk someone else through exactly what you should be doing.

And yet... Nothing!

That's not a strategy problem. Not an information problem.

That's something else.

Last week, I got a call from someone I didn't know. "I know what I have to do. I've known for a very long time. I've done all the learning, and can see exactly how my life changes if I do it." Pause. "The problem is... I just don't do it. And after all this time, I can't see myself doing it. And it's starting to piss me off." Then he said something that made it click.

"My comfort with money has made me controlling about it. When I put money down - I expect a return. And that return makes me accountable to actually do the work. So I figured I may as well pay someone to make me do it." I didn't say anything straight away. Because I was smiling. Not at him. At how familiar all of it sounded. Through his own reasoning, he got the point. And missed it at the same time. The clarity. The logic. The awareness of using scarcity as a tool. And the gap between knowing and moving - now the thing quietly eating at him. I've heard that before. Different voice. Different decade. Mine.

2014. Different context. Similar strategy. Same problem. I knew what I had to do but I wasn't doing it. And I'd reached the point where that wasn't just frustrating, it was starting to become the story I was telling myself about who I was. Just like the person on the phone, It was starting to "piss me off".

So I did something that probably seemed irrational.

Paid $18,000 upfront. One year. Business coaching. No exit clause.

Not because I trusted the process - I had no idea what I was getting into. Because I knew myself well enough to set a trap for myself.

I wasn't capable of asking for help - too much ego, too much pride in the way.

But if I paid? I was locked in. When you put cash down on the table, your intelligence goes up.

I paid so I would make better decisions and take actions I already was aware of.

I called it strategising my ego. But there was a lag... For the first nine months, I sat there with my arms crossed. Resistant. Difficult. A genuine pain in the ass.

Then my coach got tired of it. He called me out directly, bluntly: "One day money won't fix your problems. Who you are and how you turn up will. Right now, you really only have one tool."

What came out next - when I finally let it - wasn't strategy.

It was fear.

Fear of the version of myself this actually required. Scaled business. How I had to communicate myself as an offer. Even how I had to dress!

It meant developing a different personal leadership and a scary level of responsibility - Every day.

Every bullshit story I'd attached my identity to was now under the spotlight.

Was I actually good enough for that?

Once that was on the table and addressed, everything moved fast. In the last three months of that agreement, I accomplished more than most people do in years.

Here's what I've become aware of after years of being coached across areas like business, health, finances, relationships: I always knew what to do. What I couldn't see was what I was protecting.

That's not the same problem. And it doesn't need the same work.

I've watched people pay for coaching and still not move. Not because the coaching wasn't right.

Because they were uncomfortable enough to sign up. Not uncomfortable enough to change.

There's a version of stuck that looks like action on the outside, and feels like safety on the inside. Money won't touch that.

The thing that shifts it? Deciding you're done tolerating where you are.

The problem isn't knowing. The problem is what you're protecting.

And for some people, being told to "be gentle on yourself" doesn't help. It just becomes permission to stay stuck.